Tag Archives: Life

A new direction

Hello my sweets!

As you can see by looking around, I have made some changes to the site. I have taken down my book and some other pages, because, really, sales are down and the book can be found anywhere.

Why the change? Its time to branch off in a new direction. My tags will change, my content will change.

Whats to come? More talk of gaming, more talk of writing (no change there) and some more on the things that fascinate me the most in our world…like serial killers and news items.

Oh, there will still be plenty of talks of my daily hilarity that is called my life, and plenty of talk of the kitties and their adventures in driving me mad.

The book and movie reviews will be back, as I love doing those.

Of course, the occasional rant will find its way into the pages from time to time, because I am small and can only contain so much rage.

You will also find that I have an added website. I took my ‘Clattering Keyboard’ blogger site off google and gave it its own fancy smancy domain. It is listed under my real name. It WILL, at time, have different content. You can find it at www.clatteringkeyboard.com if interested.

Please keep in mind, I am not done with either site. The listing for the Bloodletting game is not quite complete, as I have a lot of content and explanations for the game yet to go.

Now, as for the difference in the site, as I’ve said, this site may have content different than the other and vice versa.

Its funny, and kind of weird, to be in the world as both Zoe Ambler and Beth McMarlin.

I have a friend I met online under the name Zoe, and we now meet face to face every few months for a lunch date and she insists on calling me Zoe rather than my real name. I am simply her ‘Zo Zo’. And I love it.

A note on the kitties. All three are terrors and I think they are plotting something because suddenly all three are getting along really well. Definitely plotting.

So, thats the update for now.

Be sweet to one another, my darlings. ~mwah~

 


November was dismal

Howdy my lovelies!

November did not go over as planned. Not by a long shot.

NaNoWriMo was dismal, with 3 people in all showing up to the Write Ins at the library. Still a person better than last year. I’ve noted that the NaNoWriMo organization as a whole is taking a plunge in the past two years. No one is donating to reach goals, the NaNo staffers had to issue a statement that the fun times for MLs are not happening next year, and, participation is just kaput.

 

In personal news, my hubs damaged an aircraft tail rotor at work on accident. It didn’t come off the trailer right. Despite it being an accident, he was fired the entire month of November while the Union worked on getting him his job back. It was awful, his blood pressure was way too high and he was bored. He slept a lot. A plus side was that he went to every one of my NaNo events with me. That helped my anxiety. Thankfully, on November 28th, his Union representative came to the house and told him to pick up his badge and CAT card and report to work that night. He lost no seniority (25 years worth) and no change in pay grade status. The downside is that he has no pay for the month of November, and we are going to have a crappy Christmas. I have a deep freezer with food and food in the cabinets, so at least we wont starve, I hope.

 

I’ve worked on some short stories over NaNoWriMo, mostly horror, because you know I cant get away from the horror genre for some reason. I’ll post some up soon.

 

All my cat kids are doing well. BaxterMarie is still queen bee, Jeff is suspicious of everything and Lil Man hasn’t a care in the world unless its antagonizing BaxterMarie.

 

In the coming days I will be talking about some games I play. Well, two of them. I only play two. They are online browser based RP games, both pretty fun, one more-so than the other. Some shameless promotion. I mean, if you are an avid reader, why not take a look? Play around a little, write your own stories. I’ve posted plenty of my RPs to here and its fun. Its nice, because its not a tenacious as sitting down and working on a novel.

 

But, that is to come.

 

For now, be sweet, my darlings…<3

 

 

 


Long overdue…

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Once again, the real world has sucked me into a whirling vortex of chaos.

 

Thankfully, things are starting to calm down…hopefully.

 

I have been lax on writing…everything.. My pen-pals are left wanting, my book, my rp games.  My brain is just kaput.

 

Other than that, however, my life is going okay. My chronic back pain is still there, but I have renewed my gym membership to help strengthen the muscles of my lower spine and generally get myself fit again.

 

Having a houseful is stressful. The step grandchild is going through some serious rough times right now, all due to the abandonment of her mother. She throws tantrums, she is disrespectful, she is angry. But, you cant blame her too much. I mean, she is 5 (6 this week) and hasn’t heard from her mother in two months. That woman just needs to fall off the world.

 

Its been stressful on everyone, but me, especially, that my meds just cant block out the squealing and crying and tantrums. I want to give sympathy, but when she acts out, I don’t want to in turn lash out at her myself. So I keep to myself in my office.

 

I have been watching a lot of movies of late. I found a movie site with a treasure trove of horror movies, however most of them are low budget. Some are pretty good though, despite the unknown actors and big budgets.

 

All the cats are doing great. All vying for my attention that causes a little bit of in fighting, but, they are my kids, so I try to give each their own attention and special treats.

 

As mentioned before, I am back on a gym routine. Its not just for my back…I have been feeling more than a little pudgy lately, and would like to get fit once again. I believe it will raise my self esteem greatly.

 

My writing is going no where at the time. And yet, it hasn’t really been bothering me too much. I had read an article of authors that spend years working on follow up books because of various blocks and obstacles in their path, and it set my mind at ease. I don’t have to crank out book after book if its not going to be quality or if my characters aren’t true to their core, which is my greatest set back at the time. My mind keeps deviating from Addison’s core personality and I am very unhappy with it. So, I have set it aside.

 

The significant other has been out of work for the last three months due to a partial knee replacement. Lemme tellya…so ready for him to get back to work. >.<

 

Well, that’s a small update. Right now all the cats have decided my desk is the place to be, stepping on my keyboard and sticking their butts in my face. Typical cat behavior.

 

So, I will sign off for now.

 

I hope all you lovers out there have a wonderful Valentines Day!

 

 

 

 


New Year with Cheezy Horror Flix

 

So I have been ringing in the new year with some of the most horrible Horror Movies ever. I have a rather large list, but just today I watched this series of movies, Bad Ben, Steelmanville Road (prequel) and Badder Ben.

 

They were just awful, yet enthralling. The f/x were way laughable. The premise was hilarious. They characters themselves were worth a chuckle because the acting was so terrible.

 

The reason I stuck it out on these horrid movies was because I am a die hard ‘found footage’ movie fanatic. I love found footage movies. I have watched quite a few of them, going off of a list I found online. Some of the best ones out there, however, are subtitled due to being foreign films. I hate having to read a movie…too much chance I will visually miss something important.

 

We had a lovely Christmas and New Years in my household, and over this past weekend I got to meet my daughters future in-laws. They are great, and we will come together to build a fantastic family.

 

I have been trying to get the cats to take a picture of them in my carry on bag and duffel bags. Normal, they would be all fighting for who gets to sit in them. Now, when I want a picture of it, they are blatantly ignoring them. Little turds.

 

Things seem to be nice, quiet and happy here of late, and I am really enjoying it. I sent a bunch of mail out in December. Cards and letters. I got a lot in return as well. I love my pen pals. And my email buddies. Its nice to have more than just the cats to talk to, because they always turn out ignoring me to lick various parts of their bodies, or looking at me in that ‘I am cat, I am judging you’ way.

 

More to come soon. Been working on a few writing pieces here and there. Gaming a lot. We are at war, so that’s always fun!

 

Be sweet, my lovelies.


Self doubt runs rampant…

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So, lately I have been having some serious self doubts about myself and my abilities. All my abilities…as a parent, grandparent, partner, writer, artist…

 

It started in November. It just started as a small inkling behind the eyes…a small thought here and there. A doubt in judgement here and there, and it just escalated.

 

Then I was sitting here the night before last working on something and I thought…should I continue to even try? My book is far from being as perfect as I want it. My writing doesn’t feel as smooth anymore. I have lost many followers and readers.

 

Should I keep my Zoe Ambler persona, all the time and work. Should I just let it go? Should I refocus elsewhere?

 

I am feeling very inadequate of late. Its a nagging feeling that is bringing me down more and more. I can attribute some of it to the holiday season. I always get a little depressed this time of year, no matter how well things are going.

 

However, I dont seem very productive. Mind you, we are all busy this time of year. This is a big book time. Here I am with the promise of a new book, yet not producing the final product.

 

I have family things going on that I was not prepared for.

 

I just have to question myself on why I keep up with things when I seem to be failing and falling behind. Am I disappointing anyone? The answer to that may leave me in tears.

 

I had a dream. I have talent. I am squandering it, I know. I am just not finding it within myself to chase these things. I feel so very let down.

 

Perhaps after the holidays I will feel better…if not, some hard decisions will have to be made.

 

Take care, my sweets~

 

 

 

 


When things just don’t go right…

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So the past few days have been a little annoying for me. Things just don’t seem to be lining up right and running smoothly.

 

My fancy Antique typewriter? Well, I had many a plan for writing fun with it. So, the significant other and myself sat down yesterday morning to clean it up and replace the tape.  Only, said significant other is the type who needs to know all about the inner workings of things. He broke something. The typewriter is now useless unless I can find someone local who can work on a vintage typewriter. I think I found someone, I mean, he advertises typewriter repair…but what is on his web-page a newer examples. We shall see come Monday. Until then, I have been kind of giving Mr I Have To Know What This Little Piece Of Metal Does is getting the silent treatment.

 

My NaNoWriMo projects. This year, I am feeling overwhelmed. Nothing has changed since last year, I just feel stressed for some reason. I am also torn between plotting and pantsing. I mean, I have 15 stories and outlines on my external drive to choose from, but do I want to go that route, or do I want to sit down on November 1st and just start typing with abandon?

 

Online gaming. My character and her husband have been planning a special celebration. It is being done in both the role play writing forum and in a live Discord channel chat this evening. I have had the role play writing thread started like two weeks ago, and there are only 4 participants out of 16. Its aggravating. Now, some people in are group just don’t have time to sit down and write a long form role play segment. However, I have given ample time to just make a single post of their character interacting. Tonight, we will see how the live event goes. I will be disappointed, and I’ll admit, pretty hurt, if people don’t come and play it out, seeing as they gather for nearly every other event, especially in Discord, where we can have music and live talk rather than just typing. We shall see.

 

We are actually getting cooler weather here in the south. I admit, I am torn. I miss my heat, however, the cooler temperatures are nice. Especially at night because all the cats want to cuddle with me in bed. The downfall of the cooler temperatures is the bugs. Most bugs go die or hibernate or whatever…except roaches. I am getting crazy amounts of roaches and water-bugs coming into the house. Now, its not uncommon for them to get in in the summer due to the cow field and crops on this little back road. But, I am getting a lot more than usual. The moment you open the door they fly in. And spiders…a lot more spiders. Thanks to the cats, we aren’t having any problems with field mice…yet. An assortment of wild critters have been trying to get into the garbage can lately, like possums and raccoons, but that’s pretty normal. The coyote packs are bigger this year, and making all kinds of racket in the back at the treeline at night. All that I can deal with…except the bugs. Ew.

 

I have a feral mama cat and a single kitten that I have been feeding. I place food on both the front and back porch every evening for them when I bring my rowdy bunch in. I know where the mama cat is keeping herself and the kitten during the day, and for hiding, but I would like to bring them into a safer area, closer to the house, with better conditions. I plan on having the two men in this house build the kittehs a shelter big enough for both mama and baby, blankets and to keep food and water inside for them. Its just a matter of getting the men-folk to get off their butts and doing it.

 

Well, I suppose I have whined enough for now. My next post will be a review of a show or two I’ve managed to sit down and watch. Currently I am watching the second season of Stranger Things. Love that show.

 

Be sweet, my darlings!

 

 

 


Back, Tatted, and ready for Wrimo

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So, I got my two tattoos and they look awesome! I wont be posting up pictures until they are healed because right now in the healing stage, especially where they are, they are kind of goopy looking. All part of the healing process. I love them, however.

 

I’ve taken the last days resting. I had my back injection and feel so much better. When I was finally able to take the bandages off and shower, it was pure bliss. You really miss bending over to scrub down to clean your little feet when bending over kills you. And no more precariously leaning against the wall of the shower stall to clean the feetses. I was always afraid of falling through the glass door. >.<

 

NaNoWriMo is almost upon us and I am working my little teal haired head off to figure out some fun things for my Regional Participants. I am thinking coffee days at the local shop, all drinks my treat. And then there are the regular days of Write Ins at the library. I usually provide snacks and water for those, and the library offers fresh coffee.

 

I usually have a prize pack for the local with the highest word count at the end of NaNo, but sadly, this year I just can’t afford it.

 

As for what I am doing to entertain myself other than prepping for NaNo, I have taken some time to watch the SAW movies. I have only ever seen the first and second one, so now I am finishing off the series of them. I tend to avoid movies with 2 or more sequels, because so much is lost or sullied. But, I will give this a shot. I’ll do a review when done!

 

So for now, be sweet, my darlings!!

 

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A day late… and a few days off…

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Howdy!

Sorry I missed you all yesterday. Still had problems with the AC and could not stand it in here…being THAT hot in my own home makes me irritable. So I went to one of my favorite places, and that is the tattoo shop. Which, happened to be a good thing. I found out they are having a special of 25% all Halloween or horror related tattoos. So…guess who is getting two tattoos done on Wednesday. That’s right, this girl.

The AC was fixed before I got home, and I pretty much just took a pain pill and went to bed. It wasn’t a restful night, however. I was up and down at all hours, my back hurting and not being able to get comfortable.

So today has been alright. I am worried about the amount of pain pills I am taking, so I am trudging through it. The injections will be done on Tuesday, usually done in the early morning, so I don’t think I will die from the pain between now and then. I’m just cranky and can’t do anything. I am going to attempt to get my own laundry done tonight, and get the rest of the family to pitch in on the rest of the house. I really would like one of these knuckle heads to steam clean my office carpet.

Also, I will be taking a few days off from the blog. I will be back to posting on Wednesday, Thursday at the latest. I want you to see my new tats, after all.

All my cats are doing well. BaxterMarie has been extra clingy and acting very kitten-like lately. She sleeps in front of me on the desk, or on me or at my feet in bed. She and Spencer fight for the little cubby to the right of me.

The rest of the cats come to me when they want extra momma lovin’s. They aren’t so demanding of it.

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Well, until next week, be sweet, my darlings!


A Bad Day…

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Well, this will be a short post. Just an update on my dreadful day.

We started with excruciating pain in the damaged nerves of my lower spine. It was like someone was plucking each one of them, and it reverberated all the way up my spine and down my left leg. It caused a jerking action, like I was having a seizure. I took my hydrocodone and my anti-inflamitories and relaxers. No relief. And I didn’t want to over medicate myself, because I am still fighting a cold.

So I tried to sleep through it.

Late morning everyone, including myself, gets up because it’s blazingly hot in the house. The thermostat was set at 65, the temp was 90, and it was 97 outside. My house turned into a sauna. So we get the heating/cooling people out. He does a quick fix to get us through the night, but has to come back in the morning to replace 2 parts.

So…that was my day.

And it is 9:30 and I’ve had no dinner yet…add to cranky factor.

 

I hope you all had a much better day than myself, and here to tomorrow being better!

Be sweet, my darlings!


Even the uneventful can be funny…

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So, last night, in my gaming world, we were about to go kill this character who attacked the head of our family. This game is based on big Families and Clans. But, while waiting for the call to arms, my character, and her boyfriend, were just sitting together outside of the place were people get married or adopt others. We had been there because we attended several ceremonies in the family of the last few days.

So, while everyone was preparing weapons and locating the target, his character tied up mine and hefted her over his shoulders, walked into the place, and they got married. No one was the wiser until nearly 24 hours later…when the enemies newpaper announced the binding.

Oh, our family was shocked. They has been fighting along side of us all night and hadnt noticed. We never gave any hints that we were planning to wed any time soon to begin with. We just upped the timing. It was perfect.

So, when our family found out through a third party source…an enemies at that…oh, that was a hoot. I simply told them all thats what happens when two spies get together…we do stealthy things.

So that was entertaining. We killed the target, though he is trying to make a comeback tonight, so we are watching him to thwart him.

I play this game with a great group of people. My best friend being one of them. Her character is married to the head of the family. Its highly entertaining.

So, I am sorry to have such a short posting for you today, but I am tired, my back hurts, and I am still getting scornful mail for not sharing the wedding with everyone to attend…lol.

My back is killing me. I called and am scheduled to have a series of injections on the 17th, and I will be talking to my doc about fixing the herniated discs in my lower spine…my thought is that it might alleviate some of the pressure on my nerves.

Lets hope.

Be sweet, my darlings!


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